Its really hard not to develop this complex about being me. On the one hand I am confident in my ways and who I am...but on the other hand, I feel like I might have a problem. Why? I can't seem to maintain any relations with a man.
Granted...everything else in my life is fabulous. My career is underway and thriving, I have my health, my social life is...well....not lacking and yet....its as if the gods are saying "you can't have it all"! That could be one train of thought. Another train of thought could be that I have to learn to be patient and keep going about my business, the man will follow. Hmmmmm......either way this complex of mine is manifesting as time goes on and as each man that I date boogies. This sucks! LOL
I am wondering....is there any man out there that is going to be able to handle me? I have to believe there will be. I know many woman that are way more wild, way crazier, as confident, better educated and they have found their matches. I don't get it! I am not getting any younger....which is totally fine. I guess what I am trying to say with that comment is...am I only going to find my match when I am 40? Cause it feels like that is they way its going.
I feel like one of those characters from the movies....the one that is perpetually single....or as the world would say....terminally single. EKKKKK!!!!! NOOOOOOOOO!!!!! I know this woman....who has found her match...thankfully. She was all over the map trying to find this man. She tried everything from online dating to speed dating to friend hook ups to random encounters and nothing, absolutely nothing! Then....out of the blue here comes her man in shining armour.....so to speak. She was 32 when she met him and is now married with a house and trying for children.
If I have to wait another couple years....that would totally suck....but as long as after that my own personal dark horse in the running catches my eye and me....I wouldn't complain another day.
