Alrighty then!

Feeling better today folks. YAY!!! I can't say that I am over the burden of this failing friendship....no way! I am finding ways to tolerate it or rather deal with it. Yesterday at about 2pm, I had made an executive decision to spend a little money and get a much needed massage. By the time I made this decision my body was so cramped up from the anxiety and emotional distress that I could barely relax my shoulders. I was in a perpetual shrug...ugggh!!! Pain much?!!! So...there I went....for a massage. Now...I would like to say I enjoyed it thoroughly....but I can't! Don't get me wrong...it was still a pleasure however the therapist talked the whole time and was engaging me in conversation when all I wanted to do was snooze. I am feeling sore in between my shoulder blades today. Had to push forward and do a much needed workout with my trainer.

Last night was a very late night for me. I don't think I got to bed until 5am just to wake up at 9:30am to get ready for my workout. I arrived at my trainer's house....exhausted, disheveled and red-eyed. Of course my trainer took no mercy on me and said..."we'll start with boxing"....lol!!! Genius woman....got heated up and jazzed within minutes. Man....I absolutely love this woman and our workouts!!! Nothing like some boxing to straighten out some bad mojo...you know?

I need a hot tub.

I have so much ambition for today. My body isn't backing me up. It is screaming to me....'need to sleep' while my brain is saying...'let's get this and this and this done by 5pm and then go and shower so that I can head to Toronto to celebrate a dear friend's birthday'. Ugghhhh!! What to do? NEED A NAP!!!

Side note: 26 days till I see my bbbbbbff! YAY!!!

Enough already!!!!

Today I wish I wasn't me! I mean....I wish I could switch some of my behaviors off. Today...I wish I didn't give a shit. Today....I am cross between angry and sad. Today...I woke up frustrated and slightly aggravated.

Something is going on. Its like a friggin tidal wave. One thing triggered this feeling of whatever it is and now it has grown into something so much bigger. Need a cleansing pronto. Can I tough this shit out for 3.5 weeks till I get some down time? Will I get some feed back from this person that has initiated the tidal wave? Who knows!!! Can I shake it off? NO!

I am running out patience with the bar I work at. I can see it isn't really the bar that has been draining my everything....but rather this problem that I have been dealing with for awhile now...and have been blogging about for awhile now. What I have learned about myself is that I am terrible at letting go. Sometimes people have to really spell it out for me. I wish I could take the subtle hints and move the f*** on.

Everything else in my life is fine and dandy. I really want to be enjoying it. F***!!!!

xo P

What can I say?

Good day world; Happy Monday! OMG....28 days till Christmas and 29 days till I get to see my bff. The count down begins.

As much as I am trying with all my might to not think about this particular person...it is a much harder task then I thought. When someone really hurts you....you would think that you could move forward without them with ease. I am not moving along with ease. I was checking out facebook on Saturday and discovered she had had her baby....a boy! Her brother posted it. I am so so so excited for her and yet so sad that I may never get to meet him. I am not so sure we will recover our friendship. VERY UPSETTING!

It is Monday....a fresh week...I have to battle with myself to keep up my spirits. I really don't have the time to be angry, frustrated or sad as I am...dealing with this broken friendship. Ugggghhh!!!

I had a good weekend. Relatively mellow. I worked Friday night. Saturday I worked during the day and then went to a family friend's dinner party followed by some festivities at my sister's. I was home and in bed by 1am. Sunday was a pretty relaxed day/night. Was visited by a bff. We hit up a local bar that had live music. Good times!

Oh Monday!!!! xo P

Sweet Dreams!

Yay....I finally had an amazing sleep with amazing dreams. Granted I only slept for 5 hours...it was more like one long dream. I dreamt that I had an opportunity to sail on the tall ships that I sailed as a teenager. I dreamt that the whole crew that I sailed with back then....was my crew this time....15 years later. I dreamt that I had the same captain and that even the woman who passed away this summer (whom I met during my sailing years) was there. It really was a super cool dream. I caught up with the crew at some village by a body of water....I think it was a lake with canals rather than an ocean or sea....irrelevant. I was desperate to find a computer to post a final blog before departing...lol! The crew had access to one and showed me the way....however it was a very different set up and I was struggling to get it done. I do remember feeling pressured for time. I think we were leaving in haste. Moving along, I do think I got to write the blog because I remember leaving and feeling complete. In this dream....we were sailing these pretty narrow canals and with such speed that we were seriously heeling...the masts were almost parallel to the water. So crazy....so fun! I was woken up by Chori's typical vocal yawns. NERD!

So today is Friday. YAY! I do have to work tonight. I hope it is better than last night. Tomorrow is a big day. I have another client that I am working with and I am taking them to view a couple properties tomorrow. I have a dinner event to go to in the evening and then the night will be topped off at my sister's house party. LOVE IT!!!

Now....I really need to get this off my chest. I mentioned that I was struggling with a particular friendship. I still am! She is due to have her baby tomorrow. I can NOT stop thinking about her. It pains me to no end that we are at a disagreement and in turn....not on talking terms. I am sad first and foremost. As much as I want to reach out to her to wish her well...this simply can't be done right now. Which brings me to this; I am sending out my love and best wishes you Lady! Even though we aren't speaking right now....I still love you and my thoughts are with you!!!

xo P

Jingle Bells.....already?

Every time I get in my car, it seems that all the radio stations are playing Christmas songs. Oy....I think it is a little early to be bombarding us with that. Don't get me wrong...I am all about the holiday cheer...but let's face it....4 weeks to go, I want to hear good tunes man! I won't lie, this morning on my way to my workout...I was singing Jingle Bells. LOL!!

This year is a very special one for me....as was last year. Getting to spend time with my best friend of all time...is truly a treat. I have been going through some tough times with friends as of late. I have...I had...a solid group of dear dear friends. Something happened...this tight group dissipated. One moved to B.C., another has become a workaholic, one of my bff's and I are in a tiff and she is playing the "screw you" card. I am not complaining. I am still surrounded by many loving friends. Where one left the province, another one filled the shoes temporarily. I need some up-lifting and I am so going to get it when I see my bff in 4 weeks. I also just booked a weekend to Montreal for New Years. Uggghhhh can not wait to get out of this city and get some fresh air so to speak. The double whammy with that mini trip is that I will be in the company of another bff. Goodness....how lucky can I be? LOL

So I went to the gym today...hoping to complete my usual workout. I was unsuccessful. I am still in pain from my workout with my trainer on Monday. 4 days later and my legs and arse are still in pain. As much as I tried to conquer the (good) pain....it got the better of me. Ugggh!!!

xo P

Oh how I love you Wednesdays!

Yup, I am officially with a cold. GREAT!!! This is also day 2 of incredible post trainer workout pain. My arse and legs are feeling it the most today. Maybe it's because I was showing my customers at the bar last night....some of my exercises and as a result....re-worked those muscles OR maybe it was all the Salsa dancing with another costumer of mine at the bar. Ha....either way....last night was awesome!

Speaking of last night; LMAO....sorry can't help but laugh! There is this incredibly hot young man who frequents my bar. He is only 20 years old. LMAO!!! He is a total knock out and naturally I'll flirt with his cute self. He humours me!! Last night he actually propositioned me. LMAO!!! I gave him a kiss and told him...."if only you were 10 years older"!!! Good times!!!

I love my bar!!!

I am spending much of my day working. I am supposed to be doing a Zumba class this evening at 6pm. I hope I can gather enough energy by then to go. I am planning to visit my sister and nephew tonight. Always a treat! Finally....I intend on being in bed by 10pm. YAY!!! What a beautiful day!

Happy Hump Day to all! xo P

PAIN!!!!

Like I always say....I love the post workout pain! However yesterday's workout was focused to every single body part; legs, torso, arms. I can barely move at all. Even sitting her at my desk is painful because I am sitting on my very sore arse. THANK YOU Trainer!!! LOVE YOU! LOL

Just have to interject.....PLEASE don't let me get sick. I have been sneezing all morning and sniffling. I do not have allergies which means that is could very well be a cold!! Noooooooooo!!!!!!

Some gossip for you; so it has been a long while since I have spoken to a particular person. The termination of our relationship left me very angry. Only recently have I come to realization that I am no longer angry and can probably communicate with this person. So...me being me....I reached out to them. BAD IDEA!!! I guess I want to believe that PEOPLE are ever changing....cause I am. Well....some people don't get the perk of constant personal evolution. Some people stay stagnant...sucks for them. After only 2 days of chit chat, I am reminded how blatantly offensive and brutal this person is. I am glad it only took me 2 days to rediscover this. No time wasted!

Only 33 days left to Christmas!! OMG!!! VERY EXCITING!!! Only 34 days left till I get to see my bff from Europe. That is the best Christmas gift!!!!

Peace out! xo P

What a weekend!!!!

Good day and Happy Monday!!!

It is a happy Monday. I got my full 9 hours of sleep giving me all the energy I need for a very full and productive day so far and ahead of me. I have already spent the morning looking after my car. Getting Rocco into winter gear in preparation for the snow. He got serviced, got his winter tires and I bought him winter rims...black steel. I think they are sexy. With that said, when I have to buy new rims next year...I think I am going to buy black or dark dark gray rims....alloy or something awesome like that. To top it off....he got a supreme bath. He looks friggin amazing and drives like he did the first day I got him. LOVE IT!!!

Now...have a bunch of little things to do all before 3pm at which point I will be getting my ass kicked by my trainer. Speaking of kicking ass....I did some of that Saturday night. A friend of mine who graced me with his presence...came to my party with a friend of his. I have met this friend a couple times. Cool dude. He didn't believe that I had any power at all when it comes to boxing....so I had to prove him wrong. We brawled. I was told that I didn't even phase him. Fine! He is built like a brick shit house. Me on the other hand....bruised knuckles and a malfunctioning 4th digit. I won't complain. I had a great time and just being able to beat someone up....feels great!

So I had my party on Saturday night. It didn't turn out AT ALL like I had intended. I am learning to not have expectations. If you have them...you are for sure going to be let down. It was fun. I had fun. I saw a few of my dear dear friends and of course my kick ass family was there. I think things ended at my house around midnight-ish at which point we went to the bar. Had an awesome time there. Then we all came back to my place at which point I fell asleep pretty quickly. I woke up in the morning to total and utter chaos in my house. It was at this point that I really got a sense of my OCD and zero tolerance for mess. Having said that, when I found out that one of my guests had vomited on my couch and carpet....you can just imagine how I felt. It took me 2 hours to get my home back in order. The only thing pending is the couch. I have removed the carpet altogether and I am not so sure I am going to be bringing it back into my house. I may just have to rent a steam cleaner for the couch. Ugggghhh!!! NOT COOL!!!!

Well folks...need to buckle down and get going! Till tomorrow xo P

What a day.....

I am sitting in my mom's office...at her house....admiring the new setup we have here. Up until today we were functioning with a primitive workstation setup. It was tolerable and decent....but now....things are SO MUCH BETTER!!!! We had a carpenter come over, assess the situation and my goodness...did he ever hook us up!! I feel like I am in a model suite for offices....GORGEOUS!!! This will make it so much easier to function....being totally inspired by fabulousness! Go Mom!!!

I started my day with watching this kick ass movie called CRAZY STUPID LOVE. OMG...I have a new crush...Ryan Gosling!! OMG....what a friggin hottie cool dude! Ugghhhh....sort of makes me sick. I had my morning omelet with coffee and snuggle with the Choo. From there I went to get my much needed manicure. I tried something different this last time...it wasn't successful! Had to go back to the typical french manicure...but it's all good! It is beautiful! From there....had to do some shopping for my party tomorrow. Still have much to do there!

I have to work tonight...YAY!!!! I say that with a hint of sarcasm...have so much to do before my party tomorrow and so little time to get 'er (lol) done! Oh well...no rest for the wicked!

Well folks....I will wish you a Happy Friday!!! Till next week! xo P

Huh!!!!

It is Thursday today. I had a wicked sleep last night. Was in bed by 11pm and slept till 9. SO GREAT!!! The fact that I get one great sleep a week...is a slice of heaven. My bed, pillows, sheets....feel like I am on a cloud. Dreamy....so so so comfortable....ugghhh....want to go back! LOL

Not sure if I mentioned this already...I am hosting a party this Saturday. My first at the new house. It will be a celebration of my new home combined with a hint of Christmas. I am having my family of course, my very favorite person; my trainer, a few of my dear and close friends. Intimate and interactive. Perfect!!!! Can't wait!!!

In the mean time....have so much to look after! I am exhausted just thinking about it! With that said...not going to think about it anymore right now! LOL

I am in the middle of a conversation on Facebook with and old friend. He is sort of fascinating. We've been friends for 15 years...give or take. He leads a very interesting life. He is my age...and has traveled to well over 30 countries. Mind blowing! Will see him on Saturday!! YAY!

I was with my trainer yesterday...did some intense boxing and kickboxing. LOVE IT!!! Of course I am dealing with some intense post workout pain...but like I always say...I love that too! I still have bruises in between my knuckles. Usually that goes away pretty fast...not this time! Clearly I am getting stronger, hitting harder. I will absolutely have to get into a ring with someone....one day! I need to be challenged with my skills. Any takers? LOL

K folks....gotta get to work! Peace out! xo P

Wednesdays...my new favorite weekday!

I love Wednesdays!!! Why? Because I don't have to work tonight!!!! YAY!!! Don't get me wrong...I love working at the bar...just really appreciate my nights off. Not having to work tonight gives me some peace in mind that I can take my time in doing everything I have to do today...which is alot! I got to bed by 3:30am and was up by 9am sharp. Had to take my car in for service today. Poor Rocco, he has been recently neglected. He desperately needs to be cleaned inside and out. Anyone able to help me with this? LOL!!!

I am training with my trainer today. I am determined to get some boxing in. Sort of in the mood to kick some ass and I really want to feel that good pain all over tomorrow...makes me laugh....lol!

A piece of exciting news; I get my business cards today!!! OMG....so friggin excited!!! This has been a bit of a lengthy procedure and I super happy for it to be over and I can start spreading the news about my new business.

I sort of want to chat about something...I have a rule for the bar. I WILL NOT date any customers...ever! This rule came about from an experience last year...while working at that bar. Granted it was a very different time with a very different feel and very different people. I don't care!!! My rule is a rule and that is the end of that!!! Now...I am pretty hard fast with rules. I respect them...especially when they are my own. I will almost never budge and I can not be persuaded. With all this said, I have 2 costumers that have been trying to take me out for some time now. One more than the other. The one that is pretty persistent...we'll call him A. He is a cool dude...not my flavour however. I have partied with him once outside of the bar (at a party)...and have had drinks with him and a few others...again outside of the bar. One the one hand...I am thinking...maybe he is cool enough to just let this be as it is....and on the other hand...I can see that he has expectations...which are presenting themselves...and in turn...makes things awkward. I have definitely stated my case and yet...he thinks he can convince me otherwise. Hmmmm!!!

Now...as for dude B....he is kind of sexy...ok...a lot sexy! LOL!!! I like him SOBER! After a few beers...he gets kind of wild...and I don't like it! But that doesn't matter...cause I won't date him! LOL!! This one is also pretty determined to hang out outside of the bar. Now...I have had to become pretty resourceful with how I handle these situations. I can't afford to offend these guys...they are regulars, they are very very nice to me, they have my back, they tip well and bottom line...I want to keep them...as customers. So...here is where my Gemini Jedi skills come into play...lol! It is a bit of a balancing act to be honest. I would get into detail about this...but that would be sharing some industry secrets....no can do! Sorry!

There have been a few (many) others that have tried to ask me out...to which my reply is a bold " I don't date customers!!" This has been a pretty successful deterrent for those that acknowledge my decision and respect the conviction behind it. I won't deny that it is flattering and fuel for the ego. Seeing as this is, as of late, my only socialization and window to the outside world...I will take it!

Ok...that is enough babble for one day! xo P

I won't deny!!!

I can't stop thinking about singing! It is on my mind fore-front and center. I was working last night at the bar and I had this customer...a very special person...come in. He had been in the show biz at one point in his life. He had some honest and smart advice for me. First...he made me sing for him. I almost shat my pants. LOL! I declined emphatically at first but then he convinced me by giving me some sound suggestions. He was impressed....is what he told me. Granted he isn't in the business anymore and really couldn't be of any help...in getting me anywhere. I will thank my angels for sending him my way however because his advice definitely resonated with me and it was completely justifiable.

I can't describe how consumed I am by this passion. It really does take up a lot of precious brain power. LOL! These days the only 2 things I think about are singing...and my real estate business. Hmmmm!!!

Totally unrelated subject...I got to skype with my bbff (bestest bestest friend forever) who lives in Europe. It really is such a treat to get to chat with her. Man...I miss her terribly! Thankfully...she is coming home for Christmas...with her brilliant fiance! Come to think about it...she arrives in 4.5 weeks. OMG....so friggin excited!!! Of course she is booked to the tits. The whole world will want a piece of her time. Naturally...I get 3rd priority...after the family of course. We were hashing out the details of when I would hightail it to her first destination to celebrate her birthday with her followed by a weekend getaway to Montreal for New Years. LOVE IT!!!! Uggghhh...can't wait!

Speaking of things that I am looking forward to...my trip to Argentina. I have finally saved the money to pay for the ticket...now just need some time to search for best price. Just thinking about this trip...puts a smile on my face. Imagining the sun, the water, the beach, the city, my family, my friends, the food, the shows, the culture, the coffee, the shopping, the pool, the heat...it is overwhelming how much I am in love with this country. Here's a thought; if I am even remotely successful with my business where as I have made a few sales before my departure...I will seriously consider investing in some property there. WHAT A DREAM!!!!! I downloaded an app for my phone; the Argentine version of MLS. I get to view all sorts of brilliant properties that I would totally buy in a heartbeat....just need the money.

Random thought; I have been going back in time and re-reading some of my old posts. Has anyone noticed how time changes things? The usual topic of discussion was men. Ha!!!! Who are they? LMAO!!!! That is one department in my life...that has turned into a dismal situation. Meh...whateves!!! Not time for that right now!

Well folks...that's all she wrote! xo P

HOLY SHIT BALLS......200 POSTS!!!!

I can't believe it actually!!! I have been blogging since mid-January and here we are...mid November and 200 posts later. VERY EXCITING!!!

How funny for this post to have landed on a Monday. Why does this catch my attention? Well...Monday usually represents a fresh start...a new beginning and as such....after 200 posts....I feel like I am on to a new project, new challenges and new adventures. Let's not forget that I have now ventured into a new career and this means....a whole new world of experiences. I have decided that I am going to materialize my blog into print form....in the form of a scrap book. One of my readers suggested that I use this online program called My Memories...check it out: http://www.mymemories.com/. I am on the verge of getting started with this software. I will keep you posted on my progress and will for sure post about the completion of the scrapbook. So excited!

Why not celebrate this as well...shall we? That is right folks...I am officially a realtor with RE/MAX Professionals Inc.

I really am beside myself with excitement, positive energy and joy. I am over the moon that things are falling into place and that my business is on the move!!! All good things!!!

I would very much like to throw in some juicy gossip for you....however I worked all weekend...literally. I worked Friday night, Saturday night and Sunday day. It's all good though! This weekend coming up will be fun filled. Why? Because I am having a party!!!! YAY!!! My first one at the new house and the first party I have ever hosted...all on my own! Super jazzed!

Well folks...I really must buckle down and get some work done!!! Till tomorrow! xo P

Lethargic!

Oh what to write....have so much on my mind...!

Remembrance Day! Just have to say thank you to all the soldiers who have given us...me...the opportunity to live the life that I lead.

Yesterday I did engage in some serious retail therapy. I ended up spending double what I had intended on spending. Ouch!!! As the people who were helping me shop yesterday said; your wardrobe is an investment. Ha!!! I am going to stick to that notion.

The little bastards were total shysters today....uggghhh!!! I am in desperate need of some down time....sans doggies. I can't believe I am actually saying that...but the 2 of them together...killing me! Got to bed by 4am...was woken up by the turds at 7:30am, then again at 9am and then as I tried to snooze for awhile longer...they were totally rambunctious and refused to give me peace. Needless to say...I am lethargic and slightly crusty. GREAT!!!!

Today is Friday. Usually I would be happy about this because I would be able to sleep in tomorrow knowing that I don't have any obligations however I have to work tomorrow night...and I will have to maintain my work mode till Sunday.

I have a busy afternoon and as such, do not see an opportunity for a nap before I work tonight. This is potentially bad news considering that when I am overtly exhausted...things tend to get hairy.

I am going to go home...shower and get ready for my 3pm appointment. I am going to pray that there is no traffic and I am going to pray that I get back in time to have some down time before my shift at the bar. That is a lot of praying...or as I would like to say...a lot of requests for my angels.

We'll see what Monday's post has to bring me!

Happy weekend to all! xo P

Ouuuuuuuuuuch!!!

Wow...I am in pain!!! Good pain...but pain non-the-less!!! I will not complain about this pain. I asked for it! I wanted it! I paid for it! LOL!!! Thank you to my trainer for a great workout yesterday. Love it!!

I did myself a favour yesterday; I stayed in on my one night off! I ate some dinner and watched back to back episodes of 'Love it or List it'. Man...I love that show!!! I did eat some chocolate covered almonds as well. I won't deny! LOL I think I fell asleep around 11pm ish. Woke up this morning to the little rascals causing a raucous at around 8am. This time...I wasn't mad! LOL It is amazing what a good night sleep can do for you. Feeling very much alive and it is 9:45am. I have a lot planned for the day. Going to get started as soon as I finish this blog.

The highlight of the day will be shopping. I am going to go and do some shopping for some much needed clothing. Yup!!! Have to! The top of the priority list is a bra. Since I have been continuously losing weight from my workouts and my 60 hour work weeks...my boobs have shrunk. I have to be honest with you...I am not sad about this one bit! Victoria Secret....here I come! I intend on buying 2 pairs of pants; jeans and dress pants. We'll see how successful I am with that. Wish me luck! I will have to use every single ounce of my will power to NOT buy shoes! Ekkk!!!

Now...since I am on the self improvement wave as of late...I did get my nails done yesterday. I waited an extra week to get them done. Why? Because I could! Being that I have to wash dishes like 20 times over the course of a shift at the bar...my manicured nails were being destroyed in no time. I had to find a way to protect them from continuous water and dish soap usage. I have been using a product called Bio Gel which is absolutely amazing. I LOVE IT!!! My nails are rock solid and never chip. They look amazing for 3 weeks. Incredible! It is the best thing I could have done for them. Now...with this product...you get a very limited selection of colour. You can do a french manicure and I did do that twice now. Sort of sick of the white tips though. Have changed it up to black. Check it out!

LOL!!! Good times!!!

Well folks...I am starving. Need some breakfast ASAP and then I am off to go shopping!!! xo P

My brain is mush!

I realize that moving into your parent's house for a couple weeks sounds lovely and fun...but I want to empathically disagree. House sitting for my parents is quite the chore. It is a big house that needs to be maintained (with 2 dogs) and it requires a lot of follow-up to make sure everything is in lock down...to sooth my anxiety of someone breaking in. I struggle with being in this house by myself. Not because I am afraid to be by myself but because I worry that at any given moment, someone could break in....and I would be vulnerable. Granted the dogs are an amazing alarm system. This is one of my issues!!! This is why I live in an apartment building....5 plex. I am surrounded by people and if anything were to happen...I am confident that someone would come to my rescue...if needed. I could be totally wrong...this is my psychosis.

The dogs.....uggghhh!!! I really do love them dearly, especially my own. However, the 2 together...evil little critters. Granted they live in a very different environment from one another. Mine has gotten used to going out at 4am and will sleep with me till 10am. My parents' dog....gets up at 5:30am with my stepfather. This is very difficult to say the least. I will get home and take them out for a tinkle at 4am...and then pray that they leave me be till at least 9am. Ha!!! Ya right! Every friggin morning they get me up at 8:30 or earlier...and of course I have to let them out. Then they are super rambunctious and want to eat...so I go and get them breakfast...and of course try to go back to bed. Naturally, they want to join me. Well...this is snuggle time for them. I somehow get sandwiched between the two...which sucks. I mean...if I was well rested this wouldn't matter...but I am actually trying to get some REM sleep...and I like to spread out. So I spread myself out...and then they get comfortable in my crevices. I tend to toss and turn a lot. And so I adjust, turn over or whatever...and discover I can't move!!! GRRRRR!!!! I hate to have to push them...but that is what I end up having to do. NO FRIGGIN PEACE!!!

I  have decided that my parents come home...I am going to give them a night with the 2 nerds...and I am going to have a VERY restful sleep...till I can't sleep anymore. Good times!!

Well folks...need to get horizontal for a bit!!! Till tomorrow xo

Reality Check!!

Well folks...looks like I won't be entertaining one of my wildest dreams after all. It would seem that I didn't make it to the next level of Canada's Got Talent. I have been reading up on the website; they say that they qualified 120 people from thousands in Toronto alone. I can only imagine the talent there. I will say this however....if when watching the show, I see that they moved forward non talented people just to add drama to the show...I will be furious! BRUTAL!

I am only a little bit sad. Meh....whatever!! I always said that it was the first audition that I really cared about doing. Making it to the next level would have just been the icing on the cake.

How am I feeling today? Let me think about this. I am on the cusp of completing 200 blogs. This will be done on Monday. Wow!!! It is incredible. I have been blogging since mid January....holy shit balls....almost a year!!! I have to say I am sort of proud of myself for sticking to this thing. It really does bring my happiness and peace. Need it!

Today is Tuesday. Wonderful! I have to work tonight and I can only ask my angels to make tonight even a hint better than last night. Uggghhh! It was so dead...I was struggling to stay awake.

There is one thing happening today that is seriously going to lift my spirits....and that is shopping for flights to Argentina!!! YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!! So so so happy....I can't wait!!!

Well folks...that all she wrote for today! xo P

Happy Monday!

I have to say...I feel like I am on a bit of a vacation myself cause my mom (a.k.a boss) is gone till Sunday. I have maintained my productivity...but have definitely maximized on the free moments here and there. Good times!!

I hope everyone had a great weekend. Mine was action packed as usual. My kick ass nephew celebrated his 3rd birthday on Saturday. He got so many amazing gifts...can't wait to spend some time with him and his new toys. I absolutely love spending time with my family. Such amazing people. Man....I am lucky!!!

This weekend was a bit of a sentimental one. After the my nephew's bday party, I went out with a friend...a friend who is a bff to one of my bffs. Does that make sense? LOL Let's just call him #3. I met him through my bff. We have really gotten to expand on our friendship and since...have really come to be sort of tight. YAY!!!  Not only did I do some partying with him Saturday night....also hung out low key with him at his new pad last night. Cool dude! I told him...getting to hang out with him....sort of feels like I am hanging out with my bff...the one reminds me of the other. It is a great feeling! I think he said the same! The great man who brought us together now lives in B.C. I miss him dearly...but thankfully...he manages to stay in touch. Had a lengthy chat with him yesterday....so great to hear he is doing well...and coming home for Christmas!! YAY! Can't wait!

I was also in the presence of another bff for pretty much the whole day yesterday. Had such a great day/night!

Now....it is back to the real world and to the grind of my future business. LOVIN IT!!!

Side note; I still haven't heard anything from Canada's Got Talent....but I read on the website to hang tight...could be waiting right up till the 15th. So...there is still hope! Fingers crossed people!!! PLEASE!!!

Another side note; I am hitting my 200 posts by the end of the week!!!! SO CRAZY!!!!

Had to go there!

I know I said I don't talk about political matters. I don't like sharing my thoughts on such issues. However...there are very few issues that really make my blood boil and these issues...I can't stay quiet about.

I wouldn't even be bringing it up but it seems that I have been blasted by it over the past 2 days....for some odd reason and now...I can't stop thinking about it and I need to express myself.

It started yesterday with a post on Facebook from a friend. It was a picture with a very short short blurb about what the image was about. The image was horrifying. The blurb was nothing less! Naturally, I reacted to what I saw and rightfully so. However, a friend of mine who is prone to having full insight on most issues...pitched in the full story!! Thank you! I went from vomiting in my mouth....to simply shaking my head. Not because the actuality of the situation was any different but rather the circumstance had changed! I was not surprised in learning of the circumstance.

Now before I get into what the whole event was about....I want to say this; I am NOT discussing the topic of Pit Bulls. I am discussing the topic of human brutality.

I just read yesterday's Globe & Mail newspaper today. Inside the front page they do a sort of history reflection...and yesterday's reflection was this:
"Sputnik 2 Carries First Dog into Orbit"
In 1957, the Soviet space program decided to send a dog out to do a man's job or...to test the waters so to speak. They picked up a stray dog...and sent her to space. After 7 hours she died of panic and overheating! I am sorry....but WTF is that? Ok...I am not stupid and I not naive. I know that we use animals for everything as a prequel to what we do and what we use ourselves but common. What did they think would happen? They took a stray dog....that has been roaming the streets...having to survive...scavenging for food and shelter. This poor thing was in lock down for 7 hours in an enclosure that is illegal by today's standards. This makes me very angry. Today...lab animals are bred in captivity, are provided food and shelter and know nothing about a normal life. This is the animal they should have used. An animal that is totally familiar with closed spaces, familiar with lab practices. Please...don't think I am condoning any of this....but if they have to....let's be humane about the whole thing.

So there was yesterday's Facebook post re; the pittie that got shot because its foster parent is a complete loser followed by this article about the poor poor dog that suffered and died in agony, pain, discomfort, fear, anxiety, stress...uggghhhhh...makes me very very very upset.

The third element to provoke my rage was a customer at my bar last night. He was talking to another customer about her cats. I didn't grasp the context of their conversation until he asked me if I had any pets. I told him I did! He asked me what kind of owner I was. At first I didn't understand what he meant....but just to be clear on all levels....I told him I would go to jail for my dog; as in...if anyone laid a hand on my dog in any negative manner....I would seriously hurt them or even kill them. This upset my customer...and very much so. Please...a side note here....he was very drunk. He started ripping me a new asshole...saying I am a heartless person because there are people starving in the world and are deprived of water. How dare I have an animal, give it the basics of life to live....when there are people dying of dehydration and malnutrition.

Oh noodles!! Being that he was drunk...and we barely know each other...I told him to go home. If I was an asshole....I could tell him stop drinking booze like a fish and spending hundreds of dollars at the bar on alcohol. But...I took the high road. I will say that I could have easily gotten into it with him. That wouldn't have been the right way to go.

These 3 events....has left me feeling terrible about how we humans handle animals in every way. We have a responsibility. I don't care what you say! WE DO!!! I strongly believe that there should be rules to owning animals. There should be laws governing who can own and who can not. If you don't have a job and in turn have no money....you shouldn't own a dog. If you have a criminal record of any kind....you should not own an animal. No one should be able to breed an animal unless you have a license to do so. Pet insurance should be the law. Finally...every animal owner should be obligated to watch 10 episodes of the Dog whisperer....because he is an angel for the animal kingdom and as such...wants you the owner to enjoy your pet as you were meant to. He enables you...the owner to communicate with you animal so that you are in a peaceful, loving and happy environment...the best place to be!

If I have offended anyone...I apologize in advance! I have seen some bad shit in my time (working in the veterinary business) and I have experienced some really really incredible things as a dog owner. I have a place in my heart for all animals...especially my own. All I ask is this.....let us please show the animal kingdom the respect is deserves. I am love with people who work relentlessly for this cause. More power to you! For those of you who defy this...well....there is that saying....Karma is a bitch! So...good luck with that!

Huh!!!

I had such a crazy dream this morning. It was broken up by my awakening from the dogs. The dream was normal until I got up to let them out. I wanted to get back to that dream so I quickly let them out and immediately went back to bed. Luckily....my dream came right back. I was working at my bar and it was a Thursday; Karaoke night. It looked different than it actually does. Not too sure what the symbolizes. So...it is early in the evening, not too many people there...just a few regulars. Then as time passes, more and more people are coming in. People I don't recognize.

Where things got super crazy was when I was taking an order from one guy...I couldn't for the life of me make out what he was asking for with the first drink. I simply couldn't hear him. I asked him to repeat himself like 4 times and still nothing. I managed to hear the next 2 orders; vodka cranberry and 3 'amazing' caesars. No problem. I was thinking to myself...I will make up the first drink and all will be well. So there I go.....to make those drinks and then I notice there are like 10 people behind the bar. WTF? I work alone! Who are these people and where do they come from? Then I stop and take a look around and notice that there are a lot of people in the bar...but they are not patrons. They are doing things like putting the chairs on the table, dismantling things, taking things apart, bringing in new equipment...WEIRD!!!

I stop what I am doing because I figure what the hell is going on....obviously the bar is closing for the night. I asked if there was still going to be karaoke....to which the reply was no. Then I see this woman and she is letting all the patrons out and telling them there the bar is closed for the rest of the week due to renovations. Ha!!!! So messed up. Then....finally I was notified that there is new management and that I am fired. Ha!!! Being very upset about the situation, I spoke to who I guess is the new manager or owner. She explained the situation to me. I asked her if I could keep my job but not as a bartender but rather a server. She asked me why; I said that I was not up to par for providing the service that this new bar would need. It was to become a high end martini cocktail bar. I have never been asked to make a martini or specialty cocktail at my bar...so it is not my forte. I explained this to her. She laughed and said she needed a minute and left. She came back and said that I still have a job and that I could start with Saturdays serving. YAY!!! Neither of us spoke of this during our conversation....but she knew my mom and I gathered that is why she made an effort to hook me up.

This was my dream!

Now....this could mean a billion things. But seeing as I was troubled going to bed and woke up troubled because of this whole friend issue....my perception on the meaning of this dream and how it applies to my troubles is this:

Something is going to take me out of my comfort zone. Does not matter what it is! I was in a comfort zone with this friend and something took me out of it. Instead of taking it to a dark place, work with it and redefine the situation...once the dust has settled as my reader commented this morning.

Ok!!! I am game! Let us see where this goes! xo P

Blah!

I wasn't going to write today. I was going to take the day off. I gave myself an official F*** Off Day!!! I managed to stay offline most of the day until I got a text about half an hour ago from a bff asking me if I was alright. She was worried because I hadn't posted a blog today nor had I been on Facebook at all. LOL!!! No worries Sunshine! I am alive!

It is 11pm and I just got back from having a wonderful evening with a wonderful friend. Uggghhhh, man am I lucky to have the few brilliant friends that I do!!! I picked her up at her work and then we went for Sushi on Bloor. YUMMMMY!!! This was followed by a cocktail at a kick ass bar across the street. This kind of evening brings me back to what I liked about Toronto. Good times!!!

Now, I just got back to my parent's place cause I am house sitting and I figure...hey, let's check out Facebook. Well...wasn't that a bad idea! Of course I got a very unpleasant message from a 'friend'. This is one of the friends I was discussing during yesterday's blog. I don't know why I am surprised that I got this kind of message. Most people don't like being called out on their shit, nor do people like being told that they fucked up. Now...I am not going to paint myself in a pretty picture. My flaw is that I hoard my negative emotions and bottle them up until I simply can not contain it anymore. This is one of those occasions. I have bottled up some negative emotions when it comes to this person and with the 2 events that took place over the past week, this threw me over the edge...yesterday was D-Day! I can totally appreciate that this person is going through an extremely tough time...fair enough. However...it is completely uncool that I witnessed these 2 events take place and then this person has the audacity to tell me that I am being selfish....well...that just tells me that I was never really an important person to her and I should take the hint and walk away.

So...that is what I am going to do! Maybe this has been my fault the whole time. I always knew that I was giving more than I could ever receive from this person. She even told me " you were always a better friend than I was"! I should have taken that as a sign. Uggggh!!!! I feel gross and angry right now. I have invested 16 years into this friendship. FUUUUUUUUUDGE!!!!

Lots on my mind!!!

Of course, as usual, I have about a zillion things on my mind. If I were to share in bullet form, that would still be a VERY long blog. I will have to prioritize for you!

I am in a great mood today. Not too sure why!! Nothing exceptional has happened. I guess the ickiness from the weekend is fading. YAY!!!

I have 2 friends that have struck a nerve with me. They definitely don't know this because I haven't shared with them but how can they not know that they have disrespected me...that would be total and utter ignorance. One the one hand I shouldn't be upset because this is very typical behavior of them but on the other hand, I am getting tired of making excuses for their caca behavior. Uggghh!!!

I think I am short of patience stemming from the bar. Here is a statistic for you; only 1 in 4 people tip. I have reached the limit to my patience with these people. I MUST devise a plan to expose them. All I can think of is what Amy Adams did in the movie The Fighter. She had a cow bell that she would ring if someone didn't tip. I WANT THAT!!!!! I like this idea very much but...I really would be ringing that bell way too often...more than I think I could handle. Mind you, people just might get the hint and start tipping just to avoid the sound of the bell. Anyone have any other ideas? Please....do share!

Back to this friend business; I know I recently blogged about having some of the dearest friends ever and that I am super fortunate. I still stand by this. I have however been reminded that there are a few bad apples in the crowd and by bad I mean...ones that don't even come close to giving me what I give them. I am getting to an age where my free time is running low as is everyone else's BUT I will not tolerate going the extra mile for them (as I always have) just to get neglected or shafted. I don't have the time or patience to sustain these friendships anymore. I really need to do some mind f***ing to train myself not to care and just let them be. It is very sad actually!

Uggggh.....ok!! I am no longer in a good mood! xo P