Actually.....don't! LOL
I am really not complaining about the rain! To be perfectly honest...I couldn't care less about it raining outside. Why? Because I have to study today....stuck inside anyways.
I am in a relatively great mood. I had a great night last night...with you know who! He's amazing! So far today has been productive. Had to get some blood taken for my annual health exam. I think the nurse took something like 10 vials of blood from me...and some pee!! LOL Good times!! I ALWAYS struggle with the blood taking. It isn't about the needles....its about seeing my own blood leaving my body. Just imagining it (cause I definitely don't watch while its happening) gives me the shivers. I had a minor panic attack....the nurse just laughed at me. They always do! They ask; "how can you be so nervous...when you've had tons of needles in your body through tattooing?" My reply; IT ISN'T THE SAME!!! I am sure you all understand why!
I have a workout with my angel Rhonda this afternoon! Its going to be great! Going to get my boxing on....going to beat the crap out the punching bag...as I always do! Can't wait to feel the soreness tomorrow. Small pleasures people!
Now...I had a very dear friend tell me yesterday to post the post that I mentioned in yesterday's blog. I immediately thought...why not! After many hours of contemplation...I decided against it! Here's why...
I, for some reason, don't like to hang onto shit. I think it is bad for your health. This is why I say...I need my workouts with Rhonda...as often as possible. LOL It makes me feel off/weird/uncomfortable....sending out to the universe...thoughts that existed for a moment in time. Since Friday...I have changed my feelings on the matter which led me to write that blog. This is why...I can't possibly put out those thoughts...now! They have expired. However....it is my goal to combine all of my blogs...even ones that I haven't posted...and eventually put it into a book; Paula's memoirs. Sounds great...no? LMAO So if you can hold out....you'll be able to read it...one day!
There is one thing I will say on that matter.....
You know who you are.....even if you tell me you don't read my blog.....I know you do! You think you can lie to me, manipulate me, hurt me and break me down......well....think again! You couldn't be anymore wrong! You say people don't change....I think what you are really seeing is how you haven't changed. People still react to you the way we do since the beginning of time (your time)....because you are exactly the same as you have always been! I can move past this......wipe everything away.....if you would only apologize! That is all it would take. I leave it to you!!!
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