It really is sort of funny.....I mean....in about 90% of my life...I have control and can do things with confidence and conviction....in that last 10%.....I just can't figure out why I live in fear and can't stand up. WTF????!!!!
I apologize in advance....I can not explain the situation with detail without exposing the other party involved. Just know....that I had the opportunity last night to make a move in a situation that required a dramatic proposition be presented. Does that make sense? I have been waiting patiently to state my case...and I had the chance yesterday....and I flaked out! GRRRRR....so angry with myself. Not to mention....I had a friggin intense dream last night...no doubt due to my feeling the way I do. I won't get into the dream just now. Very long and descriptive.
Now...there will be plenty other opportunities for me to say my piece....but I feel that the longer I take....the harder it will be to stand by it. So...it sort of needs to happen TODAY!!!!! EKKKKK!!!! Here it is folks...the weakness in me is taking over. WHY????? I don't get it! I can't stand these moments. I strive to be strong and emotionally sound....but there are a few people out there who challenge me in the worst way when it comes to this. I realize that this could be my gods/angels....testing me....giving me the most intense challenge....pushing me so far....well to that I say....F***!!!
I need your help!!!!! Please think of me tonight....send me all of your positive thoughts and love. I need your support!
xo P
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